I Dare You To Move

I Dare You To Move - Switchfoot

Welcome to the planet
Welcome to existence
Everyone's here
Everyone's here
Everybody's watching you now
Everybody waits for you now
What happens next?
What happens next?
I dare you to move
I dare you to move
I dare you to lift yourself up off the floor
I dare you to move
I dare you to move
Like today never happened
Today never happened before
Welcome to the fallout
Welcome to resistance
The tension is here
The tension is here
Between who you are and who you could be
Between how it is and how it should be
I dare you to move
I dare you to move
I dare you to lift yourself up off the floor
I dare you to move
I dare you to move
Like today never happened
Today never happened
Maybe redemption has stories to tell
Maybe forgiveness is right where you fell
Where can you run to escape from yourself?
Where you gonna go?
Where you gonna go?
Salvation is here
I dare you to move
I dare you to move
I dare you to lift yourself up off the floor
I dare you to move
I dare you to move
Like today never happened
Today never happened
Today never happened
Today never happened before


Well, it's almost 3 am and I'm still awake on my computer having some thoughts. I began listening to this song about half an hour ago. It's played a good many times, seeing as it's on repeat and all. Even though it's played for a long time, I just really listened to it. It just became loud in my ears all of a sudden. I was amazed at it. I began to cry, not only because of the song, but the song had alot to do with it.

The first few lines talk about how you're part of the world. You're only one other person, yet everyone else is wanting for you to do what you are here to do. It says that you should do what you want next. You shouldn't consider what happened today because, in the grand scheme of things, "Today never happened". "The tension is here, between who you are and who you could be, between how it is and how it should be", is a person's reflection upon themselves. You could be so many different people, but you are who you are. So many things happen, but that doesn't mean they should happen. Then it goes on to say that Jesus died for your sins and no matter where you are, Salvation is always going to be there. Forgiveness is going to be wherever you fall. Redemption is always going to change people and they are going to have things to tell you.

This relates to the conversation that Eli and I have been having for the past couple of hours. We've been discussing who we actually are. I think that I am a helper. He doesn't know who he is. I think that everything can be fixed, and that everyone can be helped. He thinks that not everything and not everyone can be fixed or helped. I don't know what to think about this. I believe and want to continue to believe what I think, but he could be right. I don't want him to be right, but he has good points and examples. Could it be that everything I've ever believed in is wrong. I've been living in the world I never wanted to find myself in?

Just a Few More Days

So Christmas is on its way and I'm completely done with my Christmas shopping. We have alot of family coming over on Christmas Eve for our family gift opening and dinner. My Uncle Ken, my sister Julie and her husband Tate, my cousins Charlie, Nelson, and Tonya, and then my second cousins Scott, Tiffany, and Tonya's two little boys are all coming to our house. Not to mention Eli. We're going to have a FULL house when everyone gets here.
Today, my Mom and I went and got some food to prepare for Wednesday night.
I'm just about done with Eli's present. I'm going to do just a few more things to it and it will be COMPLETELY done and ready for him open on Christmas Eve. I'm sure that he will love it and that he will love ME even MORE for making it. That's right I hand-made the entire present of his except for a few pieces. I just know that he will love it. My Mom loves it too. I think that I've found something that I really enjoy doing and I want to do another one soon. Well, I'm going to post pictures after I'm done with the final touches. Of course, pictures will be posted after Eli opens it as well!
Ciao!

Not So Far Away

Christmas is not far away. I'm very excited because my awesome friend Hunter is coming home from Clark University. I'm very excited to have him home again. We've already planned on going clubbing and we're also going to have a sleepover. I'm pumped because we haven't had 'the guys' together since this past summer. There is 5 of us. Hunter, Justin, David, McLovin, and me. I don't know what I would do without them. Anyways, we went camping this past summer for 2 nights and, even though McLovin was unable to go, had a blast. I don't think that I've ever had so much fun in my life! Anyways, I was able to see Hunter over the Thanksgiving Break, but not enough to make up for this past school year!
Anyways, with Christmas coming up soon, I'm going to be having allot of stuff to do. I know that my friend Anthony is coming up from Columbia and Hunter is coming from Maryland. David is coming from North Greenville and family is coming from everywhere. It's definitely going to be a crazy Christmas Break.

Song I've Been Listening To

I've been listening to a song, LITERALLY, on repeat for 3 days. The song is 'Animal I've Become' by Three Days Grace. I have found a great liking to it and what it kind of stands for. The lyrics go like this

I can't escape this Hell
So many times I've tried
But I'm still caged inside
Somebody get me through this nightmare
I can't control myself
So what if you can see
The darkest side of me
No one will ever change
This animal I have become
Help me believe
It's not the real me
Somebody help me tame this animal
I can't escape myself
So many times I've lied
But there's still rage inside
Somebody get me through this nightmare
I can't control myself
So what if you can see
The darkest side of me
No one will ever change
This animal I have become
Help me believe
It's not the real me
Somebody help me tame
This animal I have become
Help me believe
It's not the real me
Somebody help me tame this animal
Somebody help me through this nightmare
I can't control myself
Somebody wake me from this nightmare
I can't escape this Hell
So what if you can see
The darkest side of me
No one will ever change
This animal I have become
Help me believe
It's not the real me
Somebody help me tame
This animal I have become
Help me believe
It's not the real me
Somebody help me tame this animal

Now the story behind this song is that Eli and I were listening to it after this fight that we had and he commented that it was ironic that this song would play while we were in the presense of one another. I listened to the lyrics and the type of music it played to maybe understand what was going on in this song. I came to a real liking of the song and what it stood for. I think that I have listened to it well over a hundred times. Maybe even two hundred times! I have absolutely fallen for it and I really like the singer's voice. The feeling that you get when you hear it is indescribable.

Psychology Exam Grade is IN!!!

So today, I got home and checked my email and my Psychology grade was in the system! I clicked on the 'My Grades' tab and closed my eyes... I saw the greatest grade ever... an 86! Anyways, today was my Math exam. I think that I did very well with it. Everyone in there was complaining beforehand about how they had bad grades in there and they had to ace the exam in order to even pass the class. I really hope that some of them made it because one of them commented that he has been in that class 4 times now.

Anyhoo... my semester is done and over with and I'm excited for the next one to come

Another Day Turns Into Eternal Fire

So exams have begun and tomorrow they end. I have taken 4 of the 5 exams. On Monday, I took my Music Appreciation exam. Tuesday was the only exam I was really worried about, Psychology. Today, Wednesday, was the Computer and English exams. I made a 101.9 on the computer and a 90 on the English. I'm fairly proud of those two grades. The rest of my grades are yet to come.
One thing that I have noticed about myself is that, with dating Eli, I have come to really like men with white trucks. I will see a white truck on the road and just almost go crazy. I thought it was kind of weird the other day, noticing that such a thing would get to me.

Brain Songs

I have been contemplating this ever since I began learning about the capacity of the brain in my Psychology class. I think that the ability for the brain to remember and recite the lyrics to songs is amazing.
I was on Facebook doing a note that has to do with music and then I realized that once I wrote a few words of the song I could sing the rest of the song. I think that it's amazing that the brain can do something like that. I was then curious as too see songs that I could just look at the title and artist and recite the first few lines and maybe hum the tune. When looking through my library I found that I could pretty much do so for every song I looked at. I didn't go through my entire library, mostly because that would take hours, but I went through a good bit of it.
I just wanted to help you realize how amazing your brain really is. For a simple organ to have such potential is amazing and we really take it for granted.

Person in my House?

Last night, I had a very weird dream. I was at a pool but it was only 5 feet and 10 inches deep. For those of you who don't know me well, that's a inch taller than me. I was at the bottom of this pool standing straight up with my hands in the air, but I couldn't breathe or anything so I was hurting. Then, my friend, Keith, lifted me from the water. I was able to breathe again. I was above surface then, and we went back to my house which was, miraculously, his house in my dream. This caused for me to call my Mom and ask her where I lived. When I called her, she said that we lived inside a trailer in the woods. I left to find this place, and when I opened the door to a disgusting looking trailer, I heard a noise. I closed the door to find a slightly opened closet door behind it. I slowly began to open the closet door when I saw a large clear plastic bag. It was like one of those bags that covers up your dry-cleaned clothes. Inside, was a hand. Whomever the hand belonged to must have heard me and it stretched out the fingers and then the body that was connected to it, yet not seen by my eyes, moaned. I was about to pull back the object that was covering the remaining body when I noticed that the underside of the palm, was slightly black. Those of you who know me and the people in my life will know who it is by that description. I froze with my arm outstretched when I came to the conclusion of whom the covered person was. I knew those hands anywhere. It was Eli. When I was just about to lunge forward and rip the things piled atop my pained boyfriend, a sharp object protruded into my back.
I jolted from my slumber and threw back my sheets and blankets. I immediatley jumped off of my bed and frantically tried to tell myself that I was ok and that I was not under any attack. This, of course, did not calm me down. I began to go and wash my hair, but was so afraid to do so with an eerie feeling of another being in my house. I called Eli to make sure that he wasn't there and then I got a knife and searched my house in hopes of not finding anyone. I still have the feeling that someone must be in my house, but it doesn't matter now because I'm at school.